It all started about 5 years ago when I jammed my baby toe on my left foot on my couch. I jammed it so bad that I could not get a shoe on let alone walk on my foot at all. At the time I worked at Fidelity and there was no way I could wear a flip flop to work so I had to go buy a pair of women’s size 11 shoe just so I could look decent at work. Anyhow my toe finally healed a few weeks later and I hoped that would be the last time I would ever do that again.
About 18 months ago Hunter and I were in Illinois at my parent’s lake house for the week to go wake boarding and have a fun vacation. Well the first day that we were there the curse of the left foot struck again but this time on my big toe. I had this brilliant idea before we went there to get acrylics on my toes so I would have a perfect pedicure for about 6 weeks. I WAS SO WRONG!!! So I was wearing these darling flat peak-a-boo shoes when the whole thing went down. Hunter not even being two yet decided to test my heart strength and his balance and wanted to try to run down a brick pathway that was full of stairs... needless to say I started to run after him so he did not take a face dive down the path and the next thing I remember was laying on my back with a throbbing pain in my foot. Apparently my few glasses of wine made my balance not so great and my darling shoes became not so darling. They were kind of slick on the bottom and I was running full speed on the damp grass, I slid full speed towards the walk way and jammed my big toe through the front opening of my shoe. This is where it gets good: since I had acrylic on my toe I did not just jam my toe and break the edge off; no my acrylic held so tight that I ripped my whole toe nail from my skin. To spare the gross bloody details I just wrapped my toe and limped around for the whole week. Hunter was totally fine because as he saw me flipping through the air and yell a curse word as I landed flat on my back. He stopped running... perfect! I could not got wake boarding for the whole week... FYI it took 8 months and two times for my nail to grow back before I could get a pedicure again
So on Monday this week I was trying to get dinner ready and get Hunter to go potty. I was walking over to the trash can in a hurry but not aggressively by any means and the curse of the left foot struck again... I hit the corner base board so hard I had to check to see if my baby left toe was still attached. It hurt so bad that I would not even sit down, rather I had to lay down ,and ice my foot. Hunter was so mad at the wall that he went and yelled at it, "Wall you be nice to my mommy; don't rippa her toes off!" Well I have shoes on now but the top of my foot is black and blue and my baby toe has a perfect bruised line down it from where it connected with the wall...
I need chastity shoes for my feet... do they make those?
That is the worst story. I stub my toes all the time, it seems, and that hurts like a s.o.b. I have never gotten a bruise though, nor have I hurt the same spot over and over again.
ReplyDeleteSpeaking of shoes. When Russie was a baby he had to wear "Special Shoes" (tee hee). Maybe we could hook you up with some Special Shoes of your own.